So I went to Pagan Pride Day 2010 in North Kansas City, Mo. It was wonderful. I got to listen to Skewd Drumming Tribe, and let me tell you, the energy that I felt while they were playing stirred up many emotions, all good, for me.
My friend, Alfred Willowhawk, talked about Shamanic Journeys and mentioned me towards the end. Although I turned red, it was nice that he felt comfortable with what had happened in the past and working past it. I felt welcomed and loved.
I got to network with many new people, reconnect with some I had not seen in a long time, and got to learn things I had not known before. It was really something special.
I was a little disappointed with the turn-out, I just kinda figured more would be there, seeing as how it is Kansas City, something much larger than Lawrence or Topeka. However, there felt as though many more people were there in spirit.
I am really looking forward to speaking with these people again, some of which invited me to groups and events that I never knew were happening. They asked if I would write articles and that felt really good to start getting my name out, especially since I don't have many articles out yet. Some, even, had heard of me and some had already read my articles. That made me proud, but also a little worried for the fact that I wondered what they thought. :o/ A writer is their own WORST critic!
Anyway, I am hoping that the next few months prove to be MAGICAL!
Brightest Blessings to all!
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Love, serendipity and soul mates....
There is a difference between love and in love.
Differences between serendipity, destiny and fate.
And Although I am not a person that generally agrees with polygamy, I know in my heart that people can love more than one person at a time. They can be in love with more than one person at a time as well.
I believe in soul mates. I believe you have more than one soul mate- rather many that if you are lucky, you will find just one of them each lifetime.
With that being said, I also believe in love at first sight. I know a lot of people don't feel that way, but myself, I have felt it twice in this life time. Neither men were overly attractive, rather plain- kinda dorky if you will. Both with a little extra cushion. Nothing extraordinary about them from the outer appearance, yet, I couldn't take my eyes of them.
What causes this to happen to us? What chemicals in our heads, soul etc change to make this cause and effect?
This is just something I have been struggling with lately. I would really like to know the answers.
Differences between serendipity, destiny and fate.
And Although I am not a person that generally agrees with polygamy, I know in my heart that people can love more than one person at a time. They can be in love with more than one person at a time as well.
I believe in soul mates. I believe you have more than one soul mate- rather many that if you are lucky, you will find just one of them each lifetime.
With that being said, I also believe in love at first sight. I know a lot of people don't feel that way, but myself, I have felt it twice in this life time. Neither men were overly attractive, rather plain- kinda dorky if you will. Both with a little extra cushion. Nothing extraordinary about them from the outer appearance, yet, I couldn't take my eyes of them.
What causes this to happen to us? What chemicals in our heads, soul etc change to make this cause and effect?
This is just something I have been struggling with lately. I would really like to know the answers.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Fears, Anxieties, Feelings..........
I have always understood the use of fear. It gives animals and humans the fight or flight instinct leading to survival. That I have. I know when to stand up and fight and when to leave a situation and just as many others, at times, make the wrong decision. Though for the most part, I can tell you I make the almost right decision. What do I mean by mostly or almost right? Well, if I had more time in those situations, perhaps I would have done exactly what I had done, but perhaps just with a twist, an addition etc. I have no problems with healthy fears.
My problems are with anxieties. I have irrational fears and anxieties that really are not healthy any more, and I recognize, understand and accept this. For instance, I have an anxiety about deer. On average, a person in their lifetime will hit 1.5 deer, or hitting one and clipping one. Myself, I have hit 5 deer in my short- 30 years on this Earth, and mere 12 years of driving. Yes, 5!!! Crazy I know. So with a recent experience with buying a new car and hitting a deer 2 days later, my irrational fear has led me to barely being able to drive at night without being full of anxieties. Even with performing protections spells, praying and communicating with Cernunnos asking him to keep his deer safe and keep them off the roads I am driving, even with taking a hot relaxing bath, visualizations and meditations and positive thinking, I am riddled with anxiety and barely able to drive.
I also have an anxiety of falling. It doesn't have to be somewhere high either. A simple balcony makes me nervous. I didn't use to be this way. I don't know where this one came from. It is an unfounded fear. I have never fallen off a balcony or any other place. But, at least in my dreams, the balcony is old or somewhat broken, so I know what the symbolism is there.
Losing my family- especially my kids, my job, my home, not having enough to eat, spiders, snakes, the ocean/sea, jellyfish, sharks, sea urchins, wasps, bee's, hornets...... the list goes on. These are all anxieties that prevent me one way or another from fully living.
Still, knowing many and most of these things are completely unfounded anxieties, even knowing that may of which I cannot encounter such as the ocean or ocean life while living in Kansas... the anxiety still lurks. Thus, cluing me in to the need to do something about it.
Magically, I would tell someone to communicate with deity. To seek out my anxieties and face them first in meditations, then a guided atmosphere and eventually on my own. I would tell them to study their fear, talk to it, embrace it. And by doing this you will learn to appreciate it and eventually be okay with it. At some point the fear or anxiety will dissipate once it comes full circle.
So with this knowledge and with the use of my OWN advice, I will be attempting to clear my mind of this clutter, this irrationality. I have decided to start with some tea's and herbal bath treatments that I suggest to others for anxiety. Here are some recipes:
Soothing tea:
1 part vanilla bean
4 parts peppermint leaf
1 part comfrey.
If you get your vanilla bean fresh, grind up and allow to dry before using. Peppermint is wonderful for de-stressing, so I use it in the bath as well...
1 cup epsom salt
drops of green food coloring (green is the color for healing and health)
6 drops of peppermint or spearmint oil.
In a glass bowl (do not use plastic- the oil can cause it to melt, and do not use wood due to its porous nature it would forever smell of the oil you used.) Mix the salt and the oil and the food coloring until it is uniform and well blended.
Pour into a hot bath, sit and relax. Can't get any simpler than that!
Lastly, take vitamins, eat right and exercise. Vitamins help your body be in the best shape possible. Eating the right foods- in the right amounts help the body to not need or want. Grains, healthy fats, fresh fruits and veggies, lean protein and calcium rich foods are exactly what your body craves. Exercise at least for 20 minutes daily- up to an hour if you can. This reduces stress chemicals in the body.
Along with the meditations, communications, and facing your fears, this should be the best NATURAL treatment available.
So with saying this, I will be documenting my travels with this.
Brightest Blessings!
My problems are with anxieties. I have irrational fears and anxieties that really are not healthy any more, and I recognize, understand and accept this. For instance, I have an anxiety about deer. On average, a person in their lifetime will hit 1.5 deer, or hitting one and clipping one. Myself, I have hit 5 deer in my short- 30 years on this Earth, and mere 12 years of driving. Yes, 5!!! Crazy I know. So with a recent experience with buying a new car and hitting a deer 2 days later, my irrational fear has led me to barely being able to drive at night without being full of anxieties. Even with performing protections spells, praying and communicating with Cernunnos asking him to keep his deer safe and keep them off the roads I am driving, even with taking a hot relaxing bath, visualizations and meditations and positive thinking, I am riddled with anxiety and barely able to drive.
I also have an anxiety of falling. It doesn't have to be somewhere high either. A simple balcony makes me nervous. I didn't use to be this way. I don't know where this one came from. It is an unfounded fear. I have never fallen off a balcony or any other place. But, at least in my dreams, the balcony is old or somewhat broken, so I know what the symbolism is there.
Losing my family- especially my kids, my job, my home, not having enough to eat, spiders, snakes, the ocean/sea, jellyfish, sharks, sea urchins, wasps, bee's, hornets...... the list goes on. These are all anxieties that prevent me one way or another from fully living.
Still, knowing many and most of these things are completely unfounded anxieties, even knowing that may of which I cannot encounter such as the ocean or ocean life while living in Kansas... the anxiety still lurks. Thus, cluing me in to the need to do something about it.
Magically, I would tell someone to communicate with deity. To seek out my anxieties and face them first in meditations, then a guided atmosphere and eventually on my own. I would tell them to study their fear, talk to it, embrace it. And by doing this you will learn to appreciate it and eventually be okay with it. At some point the fear or anxiety will dissipate once it comes full circle.
So with this knowledge and with the use of my OWN advice, I will be attempting to clear my mind of this clutter, this irrationality. I have decided to start with some tea's and herbal bath treatments that I suggest to others for anxiety. Here are some recipes:
Soothing tea:
1 part vanilla bean
4 parts peppermint leaf
1 part comfrey.
If you get your vanilla bean fresh, grind up and allow to dry before using. Peppermint is wonderful for de-stressing, so I use it in the bath as well...
1 cup epsom salt
drops of green food coloring (green is the color for healing and health)
6 drops of peppermint or spearmint oil.
In a glass bowl (do not use plastic- the oil can cause it to melt, and do not use wood due to its porous nature it would forever smell of the oil you used.) Mix the salt and the oil and the food coloring until it is uniform and well blended.
Pour into a hot bath, sit and relax. Can't get any simpler than that!
Lastly, take vitamins, eat right and exercise. Vitamins help your body be in the best shape possible. Eating the right foods- in the right amounts help the body to not need or want. Grains, healthy fats, fresh fruits and veggies, lean protein and calcium rich foods are exactly what your body craves. Exercise at least for 20 minutes daily- up to an hour if you can. This reduces stress chemicals in the body.
Along with the meditations, communications, and facing your fears, this should be the best NATURAL treatment available.
So with saying this, I will be documenting my travels with this.
Brightest Blessings!
Monday, July 26, 2010
Paths
It's been a long time since I started on my path to Paganism. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about it. Especially since my step-son will soon be dedicating and since my brother is a recent dedicant and recently starting living with me.
I remember being about 15. I was living in foster care in a small city in Missouri called Craig. Quite literally, my school housed kindergarten through high school. The graduating class was 8 people. I was the odd ball. I dressed in darker clothes. I wore combat boots, enjoyed listening to Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, Violent Femms and of course the beginnings of Dave Matthews Band. Yes, I know, DMB has no place among the rest of those, but hey, what can I say?
One of my friends claimed to be a witch at the time. I had read books on the occult that my mother had on her book shelf when I had lived with her. She claimed to be able to fly, change shape... you know the kind. A complete nutso. She also claimed to be Anton LeVey's mistress, but I digress.... nut job. But she still has a special place in this story. Even without knowing a lot, I knew in my heart that the "witch" she claimed to be was not what I felt I was.
I had no formal training. No library to research information with, other than our schools "library" which consisted of mainly children's books and educational material. We didn't have internet. Still, I felt a connection with the earth and with the occult, which is the only name I knew it by.
I would go out in nature and talk to it. I knew people thought I was the crazy one, but I didn't care. I put wishes in bottles and buried them along the railroad tracks near my house. I prayed to the only "god" I knew which was the Christian God. I asked for direction. I asked for a path. About 6 months after doing this, my foster parent decided they no longer wished to have a teen-aged child in their home and I was sent to live with my aunt in the Kansas City area. I had lived in this area as a young child, but my mother had moved us to Missouri starting in 5th grade.
When I moved in, things were different. At first, I was painfully shy. I spent my time at work, a local Taco Bell, and at the library. I learned about witchcraft being a real religion- namely the Wiccan side of everything. We had internet, but I couldn't navigate it very well. I watched shows like X-Files and Ghost stories. I did what research I could.
Eventually, I found someone that I had went to school with back in elementary school. She in turn introduced me to a group of people. Things took off. Real witches, Wiccans, Shamans, natural livers etc. All had been a pretty interesting topic for me. I talked to everyone who would talk to me. These people also enjoyed my music, my tastes etc. Being with them made things a lot easier. Eventually, they led me to Scott Cunningham, Silver Raven Wolf, DJ Conway and Starhawk. They took me to my first Gaea experience and Heartland Festival.
At first, I was the type that did EVERYTHING the Wiccan way. I look back now and it's funny. I was a tree hugger, I wore patchuley, carried stones in my pocket, talked with spirits that really no one saw. I wrote down every dream and diagnosed it every morning. Everyone I met I had to tell them, "I am a Libra, so you know what that means". I eventually became very much like certain Christians I know. "Have you looked into Wicca as a religion"? "You shouldn't do that! Especially if you don't cast a circle and draw down the moon"! I even made up ancestors that had been witches to give me lineage. (Only later did I find out that some family had been Pow Wow artists or used natural remedies for healings, but none of them were "witches".)
Until one day someone told me that I wasn't a real witch. I got into an argument with this gentleman. He persisted. He told me I was nothing but a fake. His argument was I can talk the talk, but did I really practice? Did I really believe the things I was talking about? Did I just do it for the friendship and something to relate to. These questions weren't easy to answer either. And when he asked me, I just got angry and walked away. I complained to everyone I knew about him and trespassing my boundaries and how I was going to put a spell on him, for his own good of course.
After about a week, I sat down and did something I had never done before. I put my books away. I meditated. I asked Freya (who someone told me I reminded them of) for direction. To show me if I was really on the right path, the path of my spirituality. I must have sat there for over 2 hours, talking things out, writing things down. Eventually, I quieted my mind and envisioned a corn field and me having to find my way out.
A black haired Goddess eventually appeared to me. She never talked. She looked at me and touched my cheek in a loving manner. She took a dagger, a cup, some tarot cards, and a stone and threw them into a large fire. The then placed her cauldron on top of it, filled it with water and led me to it. As I gazed into the water all I saw was my reflection. Behind me, I heard nothing but the caw of crows or ravens. I turned around and the Goddess was gone.
I awoke the next morning deciding I had fallen asleep during my meditation, but wrote down my vision. Later, I decided that the Goddess might have been Morrigan, hence the ravens. I also had figured that the Goddess had given me a message of needing to find my own path, throwing out the tools I thought I just had to have or need and to follow my heart. After all, when you look into your reflection- you need to be just you. Not someone else.
So I took all the things I had learned and threw them out. No easy feat. I started with colors. What did a particular color mean to me. Most of them were the same, only certain ones a little different. Red was passion and anger, but also blood- a life force. Pink was love and family, but also communication. Black was void for me. It was comfort as well. It was shadows and the unknown. I went to stones and herbs. I went through a lot of things. I decided which friends I really wanted to be around and which ones just really weren't worth my time. By the end of High School I was really practicing. I still wasn't a know-it-all, but I knew enough to do the things I really wanted to do. I also stopped calling myself a Wiccan. I never really have identified with this name tag. Pagan, witch, even heathen fit me better.
I got distracted a few times. Once by a guy I liked who claimed to be an alien vampire that would bite me to get energy. Occasionally I would want to fit in again- have something that I identified with. One friend swore I was from Atlantis and we would talk for hours about going back. (Wasn't that part of a Styx song.... LOL) I chalk all of these experiences to being in my youth and having an imagination. Eventually, when something didn't fit, it went away.
It's been 12 years since I graduated high school. I have read even more books, studied different subjects, practiced, performed spells, cast circles, officiated handfastings, legal weddings, even birth and death rites. I still have never found a wrong way of doing things because the things I have done have felt right to me. I still ask questions, and for that I am proud.
I now write, I help others find paths. And my biggest piece of advice to them is the same that Morrigan gave me so many years ago now; Find yourself, the path will show its way once that is achieved.
Brightest Blessings,
Lorelei
Silver Raven
I remember being about 15. I was living in foster care in a small city in Missouri called Craig. Quite literally, my school housed kindergarten through high school. The graduating class was 8 people. I was the odd ball. I dressed in darker clothes. I wore combat boots, enjoyed listening to Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, Violent Femms and of course the beginnings of Dave Matthews Band. Yes, I know, DMB has no place among the rest of those, but hey, what can I say?
One of my friends claimed to be a witch at the time. I had read books on the occult that my mother had on her book shelf when I had lived with her. She claimed to be able to fly, change shape... you know the kind. A complete nutso. She also claimed to be Anton LeVey's mistress, but I digress.... nut job. But she still has a special place in this story. Even without knowing a lot, I knew in my heart that the "witch" she claimed to be was not what I felt I was.
I had no formal training. No library to research information with, other than our schools "library" which consisted of mainly children's books and educational material. We didn't have internet. Still, I felt a connection with the earth and with the occult, which is the only name I knew it by.
I would go out in nature and talk to it. I knew people thought I was the crazy one, but I didn't care. I put wishes in bottles and buried them along the railroad tracks near my house. I prayed to the only "god" I knew which was the Christian God. I asked for direction. I asked for a path. About 6 months after doing this, my foster parent decided they no longer wished to have a teen-aged child in their home and I was sent to live with my aunt in the Kansas City area. I had lived in this area as a young child, but my mother had moved us to Missouri starting in 5th grade.
When I moved in, things were different. At first, I was painfully shy. I spent my time at work, a local Taco Bell, and at the library. I learned about witchcraft being a real religion- namely the Wiccan side of everything. We had internet, but I couldn't navigate it very well. I watched shows like X-Files and Ghost stories. I did what research I could.
Eventually, I found someone that I had went to school with back in elementary school. She in turn introduced me to a group of people. Things took off. Real witches, Wiccans, Shamans, natural livers etc. All had been a pretty interesting topic for me. I talked to everyone who would talk to me. These people also enjoyed my music, my tastes etc. Being with them made things a lot easier. Eventually, they led me to Scott Cunningham, Silver Raven Wolf, DJ Conway and Starhawk. They took me to my first Gaea experience and Heartland Festival.
At first, I was the type that did EVERYTHING the Wiccan way. I look back now and it's funny. I was a tree hugger, I wore patchuley, carried stones in my pocket, talked with spirits that really no one saw. I wrote down every dream and diagnosed it every morning. Everyone I met I had to tell them, "I am a Libra, so you know what that means". I eventually became very much like certain Christians I know. "Have you looked into Wicca as a religion"? "You shouldn't do that! Especially if you don't cast a circle and draw down the moon"! I even made up ancestors that had been witches to give me lineage. (Only later did I find out that some family had been Pow Wow artists or used natural remedies for healings, but none of them were "witches".)
Until one day someone told me that I wasn't a real witch. I got into an argument with this gentleman. He persisted. He told me I was nothing but a fake. His argument was I can talk the talk, but did I really practice? Did I really believe the things I was talking about? Did I just do it for the friendship and something to relate to. These questions weren't easy to answer either. And when he asked me, I just got angry and walked away. I complained to everyone I knew about him and trespassing my boundaries and how I was going to put a spell on him, for his own good of course.
After about a week, I sat down and did something I had never done before. I put my books away. I meditated. I asked Freya (who someone told me I reminded them of) for direction. To show me if I was really on the right path, the path of my spirituality. I must have sat there for over 2 hours, talking things out, writing things down. Eventually, I quieted my mind and envisioned a corn field and me having to find my way out.
A black haired Goddess eventually appeared to me. She never talked. She looked at me and touched my cheek in a loving manner. She took a dagger, a cup, some tarot cards, and a stone and threw them into a large fire. The then placed her cauldron on top of it, filled it with water and led me to it. As I gazed into the water all I saw was my reflection. Behind me, I heard nothing but the caw of crows or ravens. I turned around and the Goddess was gone.
I awoke the next morning deciding I had fallen asleep during my meditation, but wrote down my vision. Later, I decided that the Goddess might have been Morrigan, hence the ravens. I also had figured that the Goddess had given me a message of needing to find my own path, throwing out the tools I thought I just had to have or need and to follow my heart. After all, when you look into your reflection- you need to be just you. Not someone else.
So I took all the things I had learned and threw them out. No easy feat. I started with colors. What did a particular color mean to me. Most of them were the same, only certain ones a little different. Red was passion and anger, but also blood- a life force. Pink was love and family, but also communication. Black was void for me. It was comfort as well. It was shadows and the unknown. I went to stones and herbs. I went through a lot of things. I decided which friends I really wanted to be around and which ones just really weren't worth my time. By the end of High School I was really practicing. I still wasn't a know-it-all, but I knew enough to do the things I really wanted to do. I also stopped calling myself a Wiccan. I never really have identified with this name tag. Pagan, witch, even heathen fit me better.
I got distracted a few times. Once by a guy I liked who claimed to be an alien vampire that would bite me to get energy. Occasionally I would want to fit in again- have something that I identified with. One friend swore I was from Atlantis and we would talk for hours about going back. (Wasn't that part of a Styx song.... LOL) I chalk all of these experiences to being in my youth and having an imagination. Eventually, when something didn't fit, it went away.
It's been 12 years since I graduated high school. I have read even more books, studied different subjects, practiced, performed spells, cast circles, officiated handfastings, legal weddings, even birth and death rites. I still have never found a wrong way of doing things because the things I have done have felt right to me. I still ask questions, and for that I am proud.
I now write, I help others find paths. And my biggest piece of advice to them is the same that Morrigan gave me so many years ago now; Find yourself, the path will show its way once that is achieved.
Brightest Blessings,
Lorelei
Silver Raven
Friday, July 23, 2010
Sh*t or get off the pot
So I am currently finding every SINGLE item that Ryan and I want in our store. Cataloging it. Pricing it. Computing and writing a business plan are in the works as well. I downloaded a sample business plan and once I have all my information it's on to that. Though the part of potential market is going to be difficult. It's been so hard to find so many pagans here in Topeka that I don't know how many their are and what the potential to the store is r how to document it. I will have to look into that some more.
I have decided that I HAVE to get this store going. In other words, I have to do it or quit complaining about it. One or the other. I can't just talk the talk, I have to do it too.
I have also decided that at least every other day I am going to have to write. I just don't know if I can serve tables forever. I know I can't. My 30 year old body can't take it. LOL. Anyway. I wrote some beautiful meditations the other night and have also been writing some great visualization spells that I will share here soon.
Love to all and Brightest Blessings!
I have decided that I HAVE to get this store going. In other words, I have to do it or quit complaining about it. One or the other. I can't just talk the talk, I have to do it too.
I have also decided that at least every other day I am going to have to write. I just don't know if I can serve tables forever. I know I can't. My 30 year old body can't take it. LOL. Anyway. I wrote some beautiful meditations the other night and have also been writing some great visualization spells that I will share here soon.
Love to all and Brightest Blessings!
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
A rock and a hard place.
Work is one of those things that are a necessary beast. Something I despise. I mean, if I could make enough money writing all the time, I would. In a heart beat. I know that would be hard too, but it would be self-fulfilling. If I could get this business plan written for a Pagan store and run that, which would be a lot of hours, but again, it would be worth it. The truth is, I am a waitress. Although serving tables is an honorable job, after all someone has to do it, it really doesn't pay my bills. If I worked all nights and all weekends, I am sure I could make it, but I am a mother. I refuse to lose every ounce of time with my children. That is not a childhood. That is what my mother had to do, and although I grew up to be a decent member of society, I do not want my kids growing up the same way.
It's not like I am a high school drop out, or didn't go on in my education. I completed a Medical Assisting degree, which in Kansas, as I have found, really isn't worth much. I have over 13 years in customer service, but I make more money serving tables, with less hours. I have been a damn good phlebotomist (one of those vampires that takes your blood to run tests on it.) but in Topeka those jobs come rarely and are mainly part time with just as much pay as I am receiving now.
Now, I work in a mexican restaurant called On the Border. Nice place. For the most part, I work with nice people. I like my boss and my direct bosses for the most part are pretty decent. I get along with most everyone I work with, which is why I don't want to find a different job most of the time. They depend on me because they know I am a hard worker and treat every person with respect. They in return put up with my craziness and my random rantings. They have watched my daughter grow up in the past year, know about the hardships our family has faced, been there when I cried about my son, and helped me when I desperately needed money.
The truth is though, I may have to look for another job. I may have to work 40 hours a week and maybe only get a little more than I am currently. It's either that or I have to buckle down on the writing and getting people to subscribe and work on getting the pagan shop open. It just kills me though because in order to get ahead, I will have to sacrifice even more time than I already do with my children.
What's a grown person to do?
It's not like I am a high school drop out, or didn't go on in my education. I completed a Medical Assisting degree, which in Kansas, as I have found, really isn't worth much. I have over 13 years in customer service, but I make more money serving tables, with less hours. I have been a damn good phlebotomist (one of those vampires that takes your blood to run tests on it.) but in Topeka those jobs come rarely and are mainly part time with just as much pay as I am receiving now.
Now, I work in a mexican restaurant called On the Border. Nice place. For the most part, I work with nice people. I like my boss and my direct bosses for the most part are pretty decent. I get along with most everyone I work with, which is why I don't want to find a different job most of the time. They depend on me because they know I am a hard worker and treat every person with respect. They in return put up with my craziness and my random rantings. They have watched my daughter grow up in the past year, know about the hardships our family has faced, been there when I cried about my son, and helped me when I desperately needed money.
The truth is though, I may have to look for another job. I may have to work 40 hours a week and maybe only get a little more than I am currently. It's either that or I have to buckle down on the writing and getting people to subscribe and work on getting the pagan shop open. It just kills me though because in order to get ahead, I will have to sacrifice even more time than I already do with my children.
What's a grown person to do?
Friday, July 16, 2010
Coming out of the Witch-closet
I have lived here in Topeka now for about 2 years. It was mid September, 2008 when my family and I packed up from Lawrence and planted ourselves in Topeka. Immediately we tried to find a local Pagan connection like we had in Lawrence, such as The Village Witch.
We looked into our phone book and found nothing under "metaphysical", "Occult" or anything similar. We looked on "craigslist" and other online searches. Still, we found nothing but an old website talking about Pagan Pride Day which happened September 30, 2006 and seems to have not happened again since.
Frustrated, we abandoned our search of other like-minded individuals.
Fast forward to almost 2 years later and I have started writing for the Examiner.com. Suddenly, out of no-where my searches are becoming fruitful. A metaphysical shop downtown emerged one day that I had never seen before. A spirit fair connected me with herbalists. A chance meeting at the restaurant I work at introduced me to a studio where they do guided meditations, aura work and belly dancing. Driving home one day from work I see a Reiki studio. An online search connected me to an Interfaith Board member for the Pagan sect. Yet another search found a webgroup that occasionally gets together as a group locally. Was it the 2 years that I had waited to look again that brought the Pagans into my sight? Or perhaps it was I was ready to see them. I like to think of the latter. Each and every one of these groups were around 2 years ago, I just was not meant to see them.
I take this as a sign that I am on the right path. Everyday brings more and more people out of the witch-closet for me to find and see, for me to connect with. A blessing.
Thanks.
We looked into our phone book and found nothing under "metaphysical", "Occult" or anything similar. We looked on "craigslist" and other online searches. Still, we found nothing but an old website talking about Pagan Pride Day which happened September 30, 2006 and seems to have not happened again since.
Frustrated, we abandoned our search of other like-minded individuals.
Fast forward to almost 2 years later and I have started writing for the Examiner.com. Suddenly, out of no-where my searches are becoming fruitful. A metaphysical shop downtown emerged one day that I had never seen before. A spirit fair connected me with herbalists. A chance meeting at the restaurant I work at introduced me to a studio where they do guided meditations, aura work and belly dancing. Driving home one day from work I see a Reiki studio. An online search connected me to an Interfaith Board member for the Pagan sect. Yet another search found a webgroup that occasionally gets together as a group locally. Was it the 2 years that I had waited to look again that brought the Pagans into my sight? Or perhaps it was I was ready to see them. I like to think of the latter. Each and every one of these groups were around 2 years ago, I just was not meant to see them.
I take this as a sign that I am on the right path. Everyday brings more and more people out of the witch-closet for me to find and see, for me to connect with. A blessing.
Thanks.
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